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I Called Her Nana
Written by: Nicole M. Carrubba
Many knew her as Virginia. Some called her Aunt Virginia. And a couple people referred
to her as Mom. I called her Nana. For five years my parents and I were full time caregivers for
her. When people think of care giving they might think of making sure someone gets enough food
or making their bed for them. Truth is, before living with Nana I might have thought the same
thing. But I learned a lot during those five years. Not just about providing care for someone, but
also about the true meaning of the word service. I also learned about the cruel thief of dementia
which eventually taught me to recognize the work of the Master of Restoration.
My great grandma had been diagnosed with dementia, which is a word that refers
to memory loss. It was subtle in the early stages. When we first moved in with her she could make
her own meals, drive herself to her own appointments, host guests, and hold coherent
conversations at family gatherings. For the most part she led a pretty normal life. But as she
began to show signs of the beginning stages of dementia, such as using her late husband’s name
to refer to her son and asking us who company was once they had left, we realized something
was wrong. We faced many challenges but hiding among the difficult moments were rich life
lessons waiting to be discovered.
One evening Nana and I were sitting on the back porch watching the sunset. We were
talking about God’s faithfulness when I remembered a verse I had recently read about God
working everything out for good. I looked up Romans 8:28 and read it to her. We continued
talking. I thought of the verse again and began to recite it, but I didn’t remember the rest so I was
opening up to read it when Nana said, “For those who love Him and are called according to His
purpose.” I was shocked. The lady sitting next to me who couldn’t remember who her kids were
was now reciting scripture. Some might have passed that off as a coincidence, but I knew there
had to be another explanation.
During that time, I was learning more about God. My relationship with Him was growing
deeper. As I read the Bible daily I kept discovering more awesome truths of Who He is. I learned
that He promises to be my Friend who will never leave nor forsake me. Watching my great
grandma who was in her late eighties made me realize what a commitment that truly is. In John
14:26, I read that Jesus promises His disciples that He will send a Helper to, “bring to you
remembrance all things that I have said to you.” That verse became my anthem and inspiration to
memorize the word of God. He showed me that this was the explanation for Nana remembering
scripture. As I watched Nana’s mental state decline I noticed how God’s intervention became
more evident. It was His noticeable hand at work that inspired the desire in me to have a
friendship with Jesus like the one Nana had.
Nana devoted her life to raising her family. She was known for being a welcoming
hostess who served delicious food. Ever since she was a little girl she was known to rearrange
the furniture so that she could clean under it. Needless to say, she kept up her house well. As
she grew older, her abilities decreased, but her desire did not. She made her own bed every day,
reorganized her belongings weekly, and insisted on washing, drying, and putting away the dishes
after every meal. Eventually it came to the point that we would have to re-wash the dishes as her
vision was failing. One night I decided to wash the dishes, so she could still dry them and put
them away, but she wouldn’t have to do as much work. That was a decision I will never regret.
As I washed, I would bring up a Bible verse I was trying to memorize and we would have full-
length conversations based on that verse. Her favorite was Proverbs 3:5-6 so I would often begin
to quote it, “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart.” To which she would respond, “In all your
ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your path.” I began to learn hymns so we could sing
them together. I was always surprised when she could remember the lyrics I forgot. I learned
later that it was the first time Nana had sung as an adult because she was self-conscious about her
singing voice. We made many special memories in the kitchen.
Her willingness to serve even in her weakened state of mind and body struck up a
desire in my heart to serve her. I began answering her questions for the fourth time as if she
had never asked before. Instead of wearily repeating myself, I would gladly reexplain anything
she didn’t understand. When her limited capabilities made her feel useless, I tried to think of jobs she knew
how to do and still could. By doing this, I tried to remind her that she still had a purpose and that
she encouraged me. Every day I watched the overflow of her servant’s heart and tried to learn
new ways to serve her.
Nana was also known as a prayer warrior. If you were going to have an event outside and
you were praying for good weather, Nana was the one to ask. If you were looking for a parking
spot and Nana was with you, she was the one who would pray for a spot. If your loved one was
undergoing a serious operation, you could ask Nana to pray and she would faithfully do so. Her
prayerful life inspired me to lead one as well. As I watched her bring her every concern to God
and involve Him in every victory and each heartache no matter their size, I started to lift every
area of my life up to my Heavenly Father in prayer.
I remember when Nana had to be rushed to the hospital when she broke the largest bone
in her body; her femur. She had an unusually high threshold for pain, so we knew something was
wrong when she was crying out that it hurt. In the emergency room, however, she told all of the
people who attended to her about the saving power of Jesus Christ. They were very surprised as
they knew she was in a lot of pain and dementia patients were known to be violent. Nana’s
devotion to her Savior showed me the truth of 2 Corinthians 12:9, “And He said to me, ‘My
grace is sufficient for you, my strength is made perfect in weakness.’” Nana was in a weak state
of mind; on top of her dementia she was dealing with excruciating pain. It was her weakness that
made it obvious that it had to be Someone greater than herself supplying her with strength.
Watching how the current of the Holy Spirit guided Nana when she was drifting and at a
loss for direction showed me how choosing to lead a Christ centered life doesn’t end when we
are no longer able to function normally. Nana showed me that a lifetime of striving to live a life
for Christ could lead to becoming one with Him to the point that He became an inseparable part
of her. Which ended up causing her every thought, action, and word to point to her lifelong
Friend. Her strong love for the Lord and ability to victoriously point others toward Him showed
me that He is the only explanation for each of her victories, no matter the size.
On August 27, 2016 Nana went home to be with the Lord. Up until her final breath her
Christ centered life was a living testimony to those around her. Even now, over three years later,
her testimony lives on to encourage me to keep fighting the good fight, and even when all the
odds are stacked against me it is God who makes victory possible.
©2020 All Rights Reserved KidCarrooobba "I Called Her Nana" by: Nicole M. Carrubba
Many knew her as Virginia. Some called her Aunt Virginia. And a couple people referred
to her as Mom. I called her Nana. For five years my parents and I were full time caregivers for
her. When people think of care giving they might think of making sure someone gets enough food
or making their bed for them. Truth is, before living with Nana I might have thought the same
thing. But I learned a lot during those five years. Not just about providing care for someone, but
also about the true meaning of the word service. I also learned about the cruel thief of dementia
which eventually taught me to recognize the work of the Master of Restoration.
My great grandma had been diagnosed with dementia, which is a word that refers
to memory loss. It was subtle in the early stages. When we first moved in with her she could make
her own meals, drive herself to her own appointments, host guests, and hold coherent
conversations at family gatherings. For the most part she led a pretty normal life. But as she
began to show signs of the beginning stages of dementia, such as using her late husband’s name
to refer to her son and asking us who company was once they had left, we realized something
was wrong. We faced many challenges but hiding among the difficult moments were rich life
lessons waiting to be discovered.
One evening Nana and I were sitting on the back porch watching the sunset. We were
talking about God’s faithfulness when I remembered a verse I had recently read about God
working everything out for good. I looked up Romans 8:28 and read it to her. We continued
talking. I thought of the verse again and began to recite it, but I didn’t remember the rest so I was
opening up to read it when Nana said, “For those who love Him and are called according to His
purpose.” I was shocked. The lady sitting next to me who couldn’t remember who her kids were
was now reciting scripture. Some might have passed that off as a coincidence, but I knew there
had to be another explanation.
During that time, I was learning more about God. My relationship with Him was growing
deeper. As I read the Bible daily I kept discovering more awesome truths of Who He is. I learned
that He promises to be my Friend who will never leave nor forsake me. Watching my great
grandma who was in her late eighties made me realize what a commitment that truly is. In John
14:26, I read that Jesus promises His disciples that He will send a Helper to, “bring to you
remembrance all things that I have said to you.” That verse became my anthem and inspiration to
memorize the word of God. He showed me that this was the explanation for Nana remembering
scripture. As I watched Nana’s mental state decline I noticed how God’s intervention became
more evident. It was His noticeable hand at work that inspired the desire in me to have a
friendship with Jesus like the one Nana had.
Nana devoted her life to raising her family. She was known for being a welcoming
hostess who served delicious food. Ever since she was a little girl she was known to rearrange
the furniture so that she could clean under it. Needless to say, she kept up her house well. As
she grew older, her abilities decreased, but her desire did not. She made her own bed every day,
reorganized her belongings weekly, and insisted on washing, drying, and putting away the dishes
after every meal. Eventually it came to the point that we would have to re-wash the dishes as her
vision was failing. One night I decided to wash the dishes, so she could still dry them and put
them away, but she wouldn’t have to do as much work. That was a decision I will never regret.
As I washed, I would bring up a Bible verse I was trying to memorize and we would have full-
length conversations based on that verse. Her favorite was Proverbs 3:5-6 so I would often begin
to quote it, “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart.” To which she would respond, “In all your
ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your path.” I began to learn hymns so we could sing
them together. I was always surprised when she could remember the lyrics I forgot. I learned
later that it was the first time Nana had sung as an adult because she was self-conscious about her
singing voice. We made many special memories in the kitchen.
Her willingness to serve even in her weakened state of mind and body struck up a
desire in my heart to serve her. I began answering her questions for the fourth time as if she
had never asked before. Instead of wearily repeating myself, I would gladly reexplain anything
she didn’t understand. When her limited capabilities made her feel useless, I tried to think of jobs she knew
how to do and still could. By doing this, I tried to remind her that she still had a purpose and that
she encouraged me. Every day I watched the overflow of her servant’s heart and tried to learn
new ways to serve her.
Nana was also known as a prayer warrior. If you were going to have an event outside and
you were praying for good weather, Nana was the one to ask. If you were looking for a parking
spot and Nana was with you, she was the one who would pray for a spot. If your loved one was
undergoing a serious operation, you could ask Nana to pray and she would faithfully do so. Her
prayerful life inspired me to lead one as well. As I watched her bring her every concern to God
and involve Him in every victory and each heartache no matter their size, I started to lift every
area of my life up to my Heavenly Father in prayer.
I remember when Nana had to be rushed to the hospital when she broke the largest bone
in her body; her femur. She had an unusually high threshold for pain, so we knew something was
wrong when she was crying out that it hurt. In the emergency room, however, she told all of the
people who attended to her about the saving power of Jesus Christ. They were very surprised as
they knew she was in a lot of pain and dementia patients were known to be violent. Nana’s
devotion to her Savior showed me the truth of 2 Corinthians 12:9, “And He said to me, ‘My
grace is sufficient for you, my strength is made perfect in weakness.’” Nana was in a weak state
of mind; on top of her dementia she was dealing with excruciating pain. It was her weakness that
made it obvious that it had to be Someone greater than herself supplying her with strength.
Watching how the current of the Holy Spirit guided Nana when she was drifting and at a
loss for direction showed me how choosing to lead a Christ centered life doesn’t end when we
are no longer able to function normally. Nana showed me that a lifetime of striving to live a life
for Christ could lead to becoming one with Him to the point that He became an inseparable part
of her. Which ended up causing her every thought, action, and word to point to her lifelong
Friend. Her strong love for the Lord and ability to victoriously point others toward Him showed
me that He is the only explanation for each of her victories, no matter the size.
On August 27, 2016 Nana went home to be with the Lord. Up until her final breath her
Christ centered life was a living testimony to those around her. Even now, over three years later,
her testimony lives on to encourage me to keep fighting the good fight, and even when all the
odds are stacked against me it is God who makes victory possible.
©2020 All Rights Reserved KidCarrooobba "I Called Her Nana" by: Nicole M. Carrubba
